Grateful

God has been showing Himself to me over and over through these last weeks. He has revealed parts of myself to me that lets be honest, aren't so pretty. He has used circumstances, and He has used people. When we got the first phone call about Ryan's mom we knew we had to go. Without a second thought, we called some of our closest friends to come be with our kids. And of course without hesitation, they stopped and came to help. We left without knowing what to expect, how long we would be gone, or what the next days would hold for us. That is an overwhelming feeling, especially if you are a planner like myself with a touch of 'homebody.' We have spent our entire married life away from family. So consequently, when we went, our kids went. It is not second nature to me to leave my kids. Now, don't get me wrong, I love love love some time away for myself. I think me and my kids are both better for it. That having been said, when I am away from them, I kinda feel like something is missing. Like something is just a little off. So driving off that night was tough in more ways than one, but I knew they were in good hands with people that love them like we love them.

We owe a debt of gratitude to the Browns, Hales and Stewarts for juggling our kids and loving on them while we had to be gone. And beyond having our kids, they, along with others in our small group, put together a care package for us with quarters for machines in the hospital, magazines, books, snacks, germ-x, and some cash for expenses. OH MY WORD. I am not a crier, but when we got that, I lost it. We have never in our married life been anywhere were we have had friends that have loved us like these people were loving us. I was, Overwhelmed. Humbled. Convicted. Overwhelmed by the sacrifices that these people were making on our behalf. Humbled by the generosity and thoughtfulness that went into that package. And convicted by the thought, 'would that be my first instinct?' would I love and give without a thought and expect nothing in return?

I most definitely buy into the philosophy that we are "blessed to be a blessing." I am also a firm believer that kids learn from what you do a lot more than from what you say. Which is a sobering thought to say the least. My prayer is that we are a giving family. Not just in dollars, because sometimes quite honestly that is too easy. But givers from a place of sacrifice. Givers unconditionally, with no strings attached. Givers out of gratitude. Givers out of obedience. Just givers.

I am grateful for God's love in our lives. My heart overflows with gratitude for the friends and relationships that He has chosen to bless us with. People who given to us sacrificially when we were not in a position to give back. People who have been the hands and feet of Jesus. People that allowed Him to use them to be a blessing to us. May I be a better Christ-follower and friend for it.